The Blog of thekittygirl

Since I am one of the community leaders in LadiesOfHive, I seldom enter the weekly contests as I do not think it ethical or fair for me to do so — at least not without disqualifying myself from winning prizes. In fact, this is only the second contest for which I have written in LOH. So, without further ado, I submit the following notice:

𝙳𝙸𝚂𝙲𝙻𝙰𝙸𝙼𝙴𝚁: 𝙰𝚜 𝚌𝚘-𝙵𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚍𝚎𝚛 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚊𝚗 𝙰𝚍𝚖𝚒𝚗, 𝙸 𝚑𝚎𝚛𝚎𝚋𝚢 𝚛𝚎𝚟𝚘𝚔𝚎 𝚖𝚢 𝚛𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝𝚜 𝚝𝚘 𝚊𝚗𝚢 𝚠𝚒𝚗𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚜, 𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚗 𝚊𝚗 '𝙷𝚘𝚗𝚘𝚛𝚊𝚋𝚕𝚎 𝙼𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗' 𝚙𝚛𝚒𝚣𝚎. 𝙼𝚢 𝚙𝚊𝚛𝚝𝚒𝚌𝚒𝚙𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 𝚒𝚜 𝚘𝚗𝚕𝚢 𝚒𝚗 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚜𝚙𝚒𝚛𝚒𝚝 𝚘𝚏 𝚏𝚞𝚗 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚌𝚊𝚖𝚊𝚛𝚊𝚍𝚎𝚛𝚒𝚎.

As soon as I read the questions this week, especially the second one, I immediately wanted to write something. So, here goes...

1️⃣ What is the most dominant color in your wardrobe/closet? Was it a conscious choice, or did it just turn out that way over time? Feel free to give us a sneak peek!

I would be hard-pressed to pick just one color, as I have always been a fan of all colors! I do have some solid black tops, solid black skirts, a solid white skirt, and a peachy-colored skirt, but those are for pairing with things that have patterns on them. Only rarely will I wear a black top with a black skirt, but that's usually if I am wearing a pair of shoes with a pattern on them (I have a pair of heels and a pair of sandals with flowers on them).

As an example, I have a pair of black pants, which I often wear with the top pictured in the second image below. It is a long "tunic-length" top (the bottom hem hangs a few inches below my groin) which has pretty mauve & pink flowers on a black background. It is lightweight for hot summer days, is so comfortable, and very stylish, too. I got it at a second-hand "thrift store" maybe 25 years ago for about $5 and it is still (after all this time!) one of my favorite pieces of clothing! So, yeah, most of my solid items of clothing are to pair with something fun or pretty, like animal prints or floral patterns.

None of my clothing was expensive. Most of it has come from the "clearance racks" from various stores, or from charity-run "thrift stores" where second-hand items have been donated to help the charity raise funds. I like shopping those stores because:

• it's cheaper for me 🤑
• it helps the charity raise funds ❤️
• it's a form of recycling, good for the planet 🌍
• it's a great place to find unusual & vintage clothing 👗
• unique items; no worry that other women will be dressing like me 😂

• SOME OF THE CLOTHES IN MY CLOSET •

My favorite pieces of clothing have flowers on them, or animal prints, or something abstract and fun (like the dress shown in the fifth pic, above). One of my longtime friends even pegged my style; she was shopping one day and saw a pretty floral dress and called me to say she had found a "Kitty dress" in a store. 😂

But other than leaning towards flowers or animal prints, mostly, the colors don't matter so much. I like black, white, beige, taupe, pink, mauve, yellow, orange, blue, green, teal, turquoise, brown, gray, purple, and most any other color one might conjure to mind. And occasionally, I find one item, like the skirt shown below, that blends a patchwork of floral, animal prints, and abstracts with a variety of colors into one kickass piece of clothing (thrift-store, $4, circa 2003).

Despite all the colors and patterns in my wardrobe, I think perhaps the most prominent underlying color might be black. Even with animal prints and floral prints, black is often the background color, or is mixed-in with other colors, as shown in the skirt, above. And with my black skirts, black pants, a black cardigan sweater, and a black hoodie that I sometimes wear, black is definitely there on a frequent basis. Women have often been compared to the Moon just as men are sometimes compared to the Sun, so perhaps many of us like black so we can shine like the Moon in the black of night. 😁

2️⃣ Would you consider remarrying or having another partner if you are a 71-year-old widow/widower? Why or why not?

Next month, I will turn 70-years-old. And, I am a widow; my late-husband passed fifteen years ago. So, it is almost like this question was tailored specifically for me, although I am sure @ifarmgirl wasn't thinking of me when she devised the question. 😂

For several years after my husband passed, I had no interest in another romantic relationship. At the time, I was caregiving for my elderly parents fulltime — 24-hours-per-day, 7-days-per-week, with no respite — so I honestly had no time for romance or much of anything else, either. And by 24-hours-per-day, I mean that I had to learn to sleep rather lightly so that I could hear someone fall if a middle-of-the-night bathroom visit went awry. My waking hours were spent caregiving (dispensing medications, getting them dressed, assisting with bathroom visits, bathing, sometimes spoon-feeding at mealtime, transport to doctor appointments, etc.) in addition to the usual household chores (laundry, cooking, cleaning, paying bills, grocery shopping, refilling prescriptions, scheduling appointments) as well as outdoor chores (mowing grass, pruning bushes, taking household garbage/recycling to the dump, etc.). So, yeah, hardly time to breathe, and romance was completely off the table for those nine years. One gentleman asked me out during that time and I politely declined, of course; but still, I wasn't much interested, anyway, as I was still carrying a torch in my heart for my husband.

Fifteen years since his passing (and now several years since my parents passed, too), I am still not very anxious to jump into another relationship. I have learned that some people actually need to be in a relationship in order to feel fulfilled in life. And that is fine for them, but I am not that type. I am happy being independent, and that was one of the qualities that my late-husband admired in me.

But, admittedly, there are a few times when I feel rather lonely. Due to the state of the world today, I find that I have voluntarily stopped calling some friends and even some family members because of differences in our political and spiritual views of the world. Many of my family, even my son, are off doing 'their own thing' in the world and I seldom hear from them. A couple of friends and I have "outgrown" our friendship on other levels and don't call each other as we once did. I spend most of my time at home, in my little "nest" with my laptop in Hive/Discord, my music/TV, and a nice cuppa coffee or tea. And I am basically happy, just lonely sometimes.

An occasional hug from someone would be nice. Or to cuddle with someone while watching a movie. And yes, even at 70, there are sexual urges (although not as frequent as in younger days), so there's that aspect of not being in a relationship, too. Maybe I just need to find a "friend-with-benefits", a guy (or girl, I'm not picky) to snuggle with once a week and then send 'em home at the end of the night. 😘 LOL!

My husband also set the bar quite high and finding another person who could complete me as he did would be incredibly difficult. We were compatible on many levels — physically, mentally, emotionally, sexually, and spiritually. Our political views were aligned, as well. All of that made for a happy home, full of reciprocated support and bliss.

Finding another person who is mutually compatible on that many levels would be a challenge, I think. If I were to enter another romantic relationship, I would like to find someone with whom I could talk on an intellectual level similar to my own, someone who doesn't fall for every inane conspiracy theory that flies past, someone who is rooted in science & logic but enjoys an occasional flight-of-fantasy, someone who isn't prone to drama or negativity, someone who is tolerant of others, someone who celebrates the diversity in others, someone who respects others' viewpoints, someone who enjoys being sexually active /adventurous, someone who can find joy & happiness in the world around them, and someone who isn't threatened by an independent woman.

That's a big bill, I know. And fifty years ago, I was willing to settle with some of that, and I did settle, but it bit me in the behind, big time. But, it was fulfilled with my late-husband. Filling the entire bill again is not likely to happen. But if it comes my way, sure, I would consider becoming involved again, romantically.

What a great question, @ifarmgirl! 💞